You couldn't give me another child.

I was in Costco today. As an aside, I just love Costco. Love it!

Going to Costco without my kids was an amazingly liberating experience. I should never do it again. I had time to look at, and buy, any number of things I should not have.

While I was there, I saw this beautiful child. She was maybe 18 months or 2 years. Beautiful, blue eyes, curly dark hair, pink, patent leather shoes. She looked like a child star. Just cute.

So, I told her mom, "your daughter is adorable." At which point, the woman looked at me like I was stalking her, picked up the little girl without saying a word, and zoomed off toward the exit. Are you kidding me? Seriously?

For hell's sake, watch a little less TV, people. When I can't compliment your child without being a baby theif, it is time to get out more. Is this why your child can't walk to school and prevent obesity? Is this why my child is the only one at the park? Have we decided that violent video games are safer than exercise? And why? Because the overwhelmed mother of two little kids is out to get yours?

Lady, I couldn't fit another car seat in my car. I wouldn't want to. I already drive in a wash of blankies, books, loose Cheerios, and toys that sing. I already have two kids that compete with each other for the title of "loudest crier." I already have a nanny because two kids are too much for me. Can't you see what I have in my cart at Costco? For God's sake, would anyone willingly buy this many cheese sticks if they weren't trying to keep their own kids quiet?

So, turn off the TV. All those little girls who have been kidnapped on every major news network for weeks? It is just ONE little girl. And pay attention, because it was her mom that did it.

There is no epidemic of baby stealers out there. There is not a booming business in exhausted moms taking kids. Frankly, if I were going to sell a child on the black market, I would start with mine. But, I do see about once a year some horrible story about some mother hurting her child. So, maybe I should be giving you the evil eye, lady. Or, maybe we can all just take a minute to realize that out of all of us at Costco that day, the statistics show that probably not a single one of us is out to get any of the rest of us in any way and that the one person out there who is a bad guy will make the news for the next three weeks.