Prep for birth. Prep for breastfeeding.

This post was written as part of The Breastfeeding Cafe's Carnival. For more info on the Breastfeeding Cafe, go to www.breastfeedingcafe.wordpress.com. For more info on the Carnival or if you want to participate, contact Claire at clindstrom2 {at} gmail {dot} com. Today's post is about how birth experiences influence breastfeeding. Please read the other blogs in today's carnival listed below and check back for more posts July 18th through the 31st!

"Help me. Help me. Help me." I crawled around on my kitchen floor on all fours crying out for anyone to help me. I was in so much PAIN.

This was my birth experience. It was not what I expected. I had seen a lot of women give birth. I was relatively confident in my ability to handle pain. But, giving birth myself was PAINFUL!

It got better. My midwife brought in a kid pool and inflated it in the living room. The water helped so much that I slept between contractions. By the time I had my daughter, I was exhausted, disappointed in myself, and I had killed a plant and probably scared the hell out of my neighbors with all the screaming.

(People always ask me about the plant. It turns out you should talk nicely to your plants. If you scream at them, they die. My lovely jade plant withered and died before our eyes as I labored.)

Being exhausted, scared, and disappointed is not the way to start out breastfeeding. I hadn't really thought about preparing my support people for breastfeeding, so when I was that exhausted, my family suggested I sleep and they would give the baby a bottle. I knew I didn't want that, but I was so tired. Thus, began an uphill battle.

I fought the good fight with breastfeeding, but it was a fight with my daughter and my family. It shouldn't be a fight. It did not go well.

With my son, I learned. I took the fight out. I dealt with everyone ahead of time and made it really clear what I wanted. I also told myself it was ok. I allowed myself to sleep. I didn't have to be hyper vigilant. I had support.

Breastfeeding my son went very well.

We prepare for the birth experience. We take classes. We think about it. We plan for it. We pack bags. We make our wishes known. We get our support people lined up. But, the birth experience is the shortest part. We breastfeed for months or years. We are parents for the rest of our lives. I think we are over prepared for the birth and under prepared for the rest.

When taking classes and making plans for the birth, make plans for breastfeeding. Talk to your support people about what you want and how you want it handled when you are sooooo tired and the baby is hungry. Talk about what you want to do when you are feeling defeated or disappointed. In the same way you choose the doctor or midwife who will birth your baby, find a lactation consultant or le leche league meeting before you have your baby. Talk to people who have breastfed in public.

That first moment. That first time you breastfeed your baby isn't always as easy as people make it sound. It is a beautiful moment, but knowing you have the support you need will make it so much easier.

  Here are more post by the Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival participants! Check back because more will be added throughout the day.

• Sylko @ Chaotic Mama-Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival Day 6
• Shelly @ Lousy Mom-Prep for birth. Prep for breastfeeding.
• Ashley @ Adventures with my Monkeys-Breastfeeding Cafe Carnival Day 6: Birth Experience
• Timbra @ Bosoms and Babes-Birth of Me: Halfway Around the World
• Claire @ The Adventures of Lactating Girl-Setting Myself Up For Success
• Natasha @ Natural Urban Mama-Birth Experience. Maybe. Cheering Squad. Definitely!
• And of course the guest poster on the Breastfeeding Cafe’s blog today is Marilee Poulson-Prepare for Natural Birth, Prepare to Breastfeed